Show Love

Posted: April 8, 2011 in Father's Day Friday, Fathering

Father’s Day Friday post…

Once again for those that don’t know. This is a reoccurring theme on my blog. It’s every Friday  and they are usually longer than normal and I look at importance of “fathering” students that are missing the important relationship in their lives. I have many father/son relationships with students that don’t have that a natural father but are desperate one. I am not an expert I just try to share my experiences so I might help others that are in my same position. I’ve had 2 previous post about this if you’d like to read them (FATHER’S DAY FRIDAY) (BE THERE)

The young men I have in my life that I look at as my sons all come from different walks of life. All for one reason or another lack a real father figure in their life. Some of them literally don’t know who their dad is. Some have no experience with their dad. Some have dad’s that have passed away. Others don’t have dad in their every day life because of divorce. Yet some have “dad” at home but still don’t have a father. These young men are from all different walks of life and all have different life experiences, but all of them deep down desire the love from a father.

There is something in every young man that desires a father’s love. Growing up without a dad in my house I had this desire and didn’t even realize it. Growing up I didn’t think much about not having a dad in my house like most of my friends. I never had all these questions or anger or bitterness about my situation. I can honestly say it wasn’t until much later in life that I even thought much of it. For me that’s just the way it was and that was it. But I remember one specific instance that is still so fresh in my mind even to this day. The instance, as I look back, showed that even though I didn’t know it there was a need for a fatherly type love in my life.

I was in JR High and it was after a gym class where I just acted a fool the whole time and gave my teacher all kinds of attitude and trouble. He held me after and sat me down and told me he loved me and wanted to see the best for my life and the way I was acting wasn’t the way to be heading. He said all the things we as teachers, mentors, pastors authority figures say to kids that we see wasting their great potential. I remember crying that day as we talked but I remember not knowing why. He didn’t threaten to tell my mom or send me to the office or anything like that. He just poured into my life it showed me that this dude cares and loves me.

No matter what a young man looks like or how he acts or what he says deep down every young man desires to have a father’s love in their life. It’s crucial to there development as a man. I know we’re men and we front like we’re not emotional and all that but that front is not who God created us to be. Emotions and showing love doesn’t strip of our “manliness” it actually solidifies it. God didn’t create us to be void of being able to give or receive love he created us to give it and through it ultimately show His love. Students that desire a father in their life desire more than a buddy or another friend. If they wanted a friend they’d pick one that’s their age. They are desiring the love of a father and all that comes along with it. Affection. Discipline. Correction. Emotion. Fun. Communication.

If you have students in your world that are in need of a father it’s not just cause they need somebody else in their world. They need to feel the love that can only come from a true father’s heart. Listen the young men in my life aren’t drawn to me because I’m their “buddy.” Or because I’m their ride home. Or because I’ll buy them a double fish fillet sandwich from McD’s. (Ok, maybe they’re drawn to the last one) They’re in my world because God given me a place in their life that allows for a father’s love to be poured into them. I tell my guys all the time “I love you” and they say it back because they need and want that in their life.

Show love. Tell them you love them. Let them know it. It might feel weird at first but the longer you show them the more you telling them will make since.

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